My World is Completely Crushed

It's weird... the best person who could do a eulogy for my dad is my dad.  He was always amazing when I saw him speak/share at his AA meetings.  (BTW, I know that there's the whole anonymity thing, but let's be honest... my dad was so proud to be a 20+ year friend of Bill W & cherished the relationships he made at his meetings throughout the years/decades.)

Unfortunately, he's not here to help me write one.  So, while I try to figure out how I'm gonna craft up something read at the funeral w/out it involving me pleading for him to come back, I decided to go on youtube & find some music to play that I know my dad would appreciate & would soothe me -- I can start writing tomorrow.

Now, since Paul Butterfield Blues Band's East/West album was a staple in our family's listening library (& b/c I couldn't find the full album on youtube) when I was just a wee one, I'd like to share this:

Paul Butterfield Blues Band's Born in Chicago from East West


Kinda funny... all these years I thought it was my mom who was the big Beatles fan while I was growing-up & it was actually my dad.  He was playing the White Album last time Claire & I were in his car.  I'm going to miss that.  Not the driving part b/c I always felt like he could swerve or crash, but the listening to music all the time.  In the car, in the apartment... I don't like the silence.  So, w/ that said:
 
The Beatles' White Album (full album)


This one's for Bonni.  She always played it for our dad at Bar Mitzvahs & celebrations.  (Does anyone remember seeing him play this on either Mike Douglas or Merv Griffin?  I do.)

Patrick Hernandez, Born to Be Alive


Holy jeez crap.  I do miss my dad.  This dying shit is really knocking the ass out of me.  Gosh, I didn't plan to write anything & just post some songs, but lemme tell you... I feel like I lost my best friend, idol, biggest fan & supporter all at once.  66 is just too young to go.  I just feel like he had so much more to experience & live.  Sucks.

& w/ that said.  Good night.  I'll just post more music tomorrow or one of these days.

Gonna wallow in my misery & then get to sleep b/c I've got to leave for the funeral home in Jersey at 7am.  Good times coming up.  Good times.